


Toss Off

by MiniNephthys



Category: Fate/Zero
Genre: Community: kink_bingo, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-01
Updated: 2013-07-01
Packaged: 2017-12-16 19:53:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/865980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniNephthys/pseuds/MiniNephthys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lancer finds his Master's pornography and does nothing with it at all.  Written for the square "pictures".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Toss Off

It's not much to see, really.

While Waver sleeps, Diarmuid guards his room, but he doubts there will be an attack tonight. Having no need of sleep, he is fully awake, alert, and in need of something to do. So, he reads.

Most of the books Waver keeps on his person are magical texts, and Diarmuid will willingly admit that he doesn't have his Master's level of knowledge on the subject of alchemy, circuits, and magical theory. Thus, while he makes an attempt at understanding them, eventually they make his eyes start to glaze over and he has to find something else to read.

He's considering leaving the room briefly to find some of the Mackenzies' books, and returning them before they awaken, when he spots something underneath Waver's bed, close to the wall. Careful not to disturb Waver's sleep, he reaches in and pulls out two thin magazines.

The first one, he flips through and immediately realizes why it had been so hidden. Photographs of smiling girls posing in bikinis or lingerie adorn each page. Nothing is too out of the ordinary, but the use of a book with pictures of mostly-naked women is obvious. Diarmuid sets it down with a reddened face, and is about to give himself a lecture on going through others' personal belongings when he spots the cover of the other magazine.

A photo of two men closely embracing is on the cover of this one. The writing on the cover promises a passionate romance and Diarmuid takes a moment to clear his thoughts before carefully putting both magazines back where they were, under Waver's bed.

Waver stirs for a moment, rolls over, and goes back to sleep. Diarmuid sighs and decides not to poke around any further and press his luck.

Morning comes, and Waver wakes with a yawn. "Good morning..."

"Good morning, Master." Diarmuid drops a small towel into Waver's laundry. "Since there was no threat during the night, I-"

Waver rubs his bleary eyes and focuses on the pristine and sparkling state of his bedroom. "-cleaned my room for me?"

Diarmuid nods.

"Lancer..." Waver sighs heavily. "Servant or not, you aren't my _maid_. I have enough time in the day to pick up after myself."

"You shouldn't have to be concerned with trivial things right now, Master." Diarmuid neglects to mention that part of his reason for cleaning the room had been in guilt over going into Waver's personal... belongings, no matter how little time he spent with them. Even not mentioning it, though, seems like deception.

Waver gives the room another once-over before turning back to Diarmuid with a small smile. "Well, no matter if you had to do it or not, thank you for saving me the work."

"It's... nothing you need to thank me for..." Guilt is crushing down on his head until it physically pushes it down.

"Lancer-"

"I'm sorry for looking through your books and finding the ones under your bed." It comes out in a rush, and despite his hung head, Diarmuid can still see the confusion on Waver's face followed by realization and a bright shade of red.

Waver opens his mouth to speak, but no words come out for a good few seconds before he can manage a, _"Why?!"_

"I was looking for reading material... most of your texts are beyond my level..." It's a terrible excuse and Diarmuid knows it. "I apologize, I was out of line even going near that much- Master, please, your face is turning purple, you need to breathe."

Waver takes a deep breath of air and his face slowly returns to normal coloration. "...I really didn't expect that of you; I guess it's a risk I should have thought out before summoning a Servant at all."

Diarmuid thinks it's perfectly reasonable to be more focused on the possibility of dying. He elects not to say this out loud, or anything at all.

"I forgive you. Just..." From what Diarmuid can tell, Waver is finding the ceiling very interesting. "Please don't do that again. Or talk about it. Ever."

"I swear I will never speak of this again." Not that he would ever have anyone to talk about it with save his Master, and he doesn't want to give Waver an aneurysm.

"Good. ...And you didn't... toss off to it did you?"

Diarmuid looks up to stare at him blankly. "Master, I don't know what that means."

Waver throws a pillow at his head, which Diarmuid could dodge but allows to hit him in the face. "Then use context or something!!"

Diarmuid picks up the pillow and gently puts it back on the bed, smoothing it out: this conveniently gives him an excuse to stop looking at Waver. "I did nothing vulgar whatsoever to your belongings."

With a sigh, Waver flops back on his bed. "Let me know when it's time for breakfast."

* * *

Naturally, pornography is the last thing on his mind after he loses Lancer and the Grail War.

It's only a long time after, when he's unpacking his things back in London, that he remembers the conversation he once had with an embarrassed and guilty Lancer as he thumbs through those pictures of barely-dressed women and can only see Diarmuid looking through them, the last person to touch these pages.

Diarmuid was married, wasn't he...? Though that may matter less when you're dead. Maybe they had no appeal to him. And probably, the other piece he brought with him, that held even less of his interest. Much like himself, or perhaps a war with a span of a few weeks was the worst possible time to bring it up; he'll never be able to ask now.

He shouldn't dwell on a mistake that both of them soon put behind them. It's not important. But he can't bring himself to throw away the magazines even though he knows that he can never use them for their intended purpose again.

It's just that everything that holds a piece of his Lancer in his heart and memories is important now.

It's always been important, really.


End file.
